I’m away from home for a couple of days, accompanying my husband at a conference (the conference is for him, I’m free to do as I please). As much as I appreciate the quiet and peace of spending a little time by myself, doing what I want, when I want to do it, I eventually find myself to be a bit melancholy.
At first, I get things done like a mad woman (this trip was filling in the calendar for the year, inputting grades for the 1st semester, prepping for the Thursday night Bible Study I lead), and I schedule in some fun, at least what I consider fun (a jaunt into Target and Old Navy, a blonde soy latte, going to a movie, a run on the treadmill – the run part is fun, the “dreadmill” is not).
Once day 2 or 3 hits, the novelty has lessened a bit and I find myself “in my head” a lot. I miss having someone to talk to. I miss (believe it or not, it surprises me) the constant low-level chaos of the kids. Even my typically fun stuff loses a bit of its appeal.
Typically, I THRIVE on the busy-ness of running a household with 4 kids (2 teens, a preschooler and a toddler) – homeschooling, babysitting, PT appointments, preschool, dance, meals, meals and more meals – do these people ever stop eating?!?!….I find it keeps me on my toes: physically and mentally. I’m energized by the crazy and boy, do I sleep well! But then there are days I CAN’T WAIT to get out of the house, to go somewhere, see something, do something. Days I hope I get a moment (or an hour) to myself to organize something, go for a run, to just sit quietly and think (or not think!).
That’s why I truly look forward to these once or twice a year events when I have opportunity to be away for a bit. No one asking me for anything, no one needing to be carried, no one pulling on my clothes, no one needing to be fed. This mini-vacay from real life gives me a bit of time to rest and recoup and to be reminded that THIS “reality” is not my calling….my family is.
I look forward to seeing them tomorrow 🙂
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